Suck it up, buttercup.
Yesterday marked 24 weeks in my
pregnancy. Twenty-four (okay, more like 20) of some of the most
difficult weeks I have ever endured, both due to the pregnancy and
other things going on in my life. I can see the light at the end of
this pregnancy tunnel, and yet...I'm feeling quite depressed.
I have no reason to be, mind you. My babies are healthy, my kids are well taken care of, my husband is amazing, and my friends and family have been wonderfully helpful and supportive.
Still, I'm feeling down.
Part of it is because, at 24 weeks, I feel and look more like I'm 8 months pregnant. I'm not sleeping well, getting up at all hours of the night to pee, then having a difficult time finding a comfortable position to sleep in. To give you a visual, my belly is so large, I have an inch-and-a-half until I can't fit behind the steering wheel of my car. My belly is so ginormous, when I tried to measure around it the other night, my tape measure ran out of numbers. All I know is that I am at least a few inches bigger than 40".
This is all great for the babies! At my appointment today, the doctor measured the twins' bellies and they are both two weeks ahead of their actual age. Good little fatties.
I would do anything to keep these babies healthy and growing. It just, I dunno, a little depressing when I want to clean and organize, and I can't. It's sad when my kids want to run around and have me throw them in the air, and I can't. It bums me out when I see all these things I want to be doing, but I know I shouldn't.
This past weekend, my doctor had me on modified bed rest due to some pretty painful contractions I was experiencing last week. It was a real wake up call that the twins will be here before we know it. That wake up call has me looking around at my house, wanting to get everything ready. But, I'm so limited in what I can do. I see clutter everywhere that is stressing me out. I see three bedroom floors that we have to either re-carpet or install laminate flooring in before the twins arrive.
(This is all thanks, in large part, to a sippy cup that spilled and spoiled on Bug and Bean's carpet. We had to rip it up, it was so bad, and it had leaked all the way down to the floorboard. UGH.)
I suppose it's just that there is so much to do, and I don't know how much time we have left to do it. And, I know that much of it, I can't help with. Though I'm not on modified bed rest any longer, I have been instructed to take it easy and dedicate myself to "slug-like" laziness whenever possible. I can do that, no problem. I actually enjoy a lazy day or two every now and then. It merely seems different, and less enjoyable, when it's less my choice and more out of necessity.
I haven't written anything in a while because I'm completely uninspired. Plus, anything I write right now is bound to be lame and boring anyway (looking at the inner walls of your house all day long will do that to ya). I need to get sucked into a book or find a good TV series to watch from beginning to end... something.
Soon, this will all come to an end. Before I know it, I will find myself toting two newborn boys around, my hair greasy from not showering for days on end, and spit up soaking my shoulders. Bean will be following me, probably attached to my leg, screaming bloody murder because she wants to be picked up, and Bug will be nearby whining about something or other. It will be in that moment that I'll wonder why I was ever down about being bored and lazy.
(And, I don't need to be reminded of this fact. I know. Believe me. I know.)
Man, I need to get out of this funk.
Photo Credit: Glenda Otero
Source: sxc.hu
Posted by Lindsay Maddox at 5/26/2009 2:25 PM 
Categories: health,mental health,twins,pregnancy
Tags: pregnancy depression 24 weeks pregnant with twins feeling down about pregnancy at 24 weeks
Categories: health,mental health,twins,pregnancy
Tags: pregnancy depression 24 weeks pregnant with twins feeling down about pregnancy at 24 weeks
Aw! I can imagine...as Virgos we are going to freak at a mess....at least the babies are growing nicely.
I'm trying to think of something funny, but nothing is coming....bah!
Kelly
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You should let others worry about your floors, as a tip I advise use to use wood or laminate floors, no carpets, this way you won't have to worry about droping anything on the floor. I could recommend you some professionals for that, check: http://www.atlanta-flooring.org, they'll give you some tips. I hope I could help.
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