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Clint and I made an incredibly stupid parenting decision about a month ago.
We told the kids their first knock-knock joke.
At first, it was entertaining. They would laugh and laugh over the jokes we’ve all heard a million times. The best part Read more on Video(s): Knock-Knock……
This week wraps up Colby’s first soccer debut.
It has been… interesting.
I love soccer. I know Colby enjoys kicking the ball around and being with his friends, so I figured it’d be fun to sign him up. How often do kids get to be on a team where they know everyone from the get-go?
Pretty lucky, if you ask me.
The first two games occurred while I was in New York for the BlogHer Conference, but I have been to every game since, twice a week for the past three weeks.
I didn’t anticipate how frustrating it would be. Read more on Not Ready….
Ew. On second thought, maybe I shouldn’t use the words “poo” and “niblet” in the same sentence…
Live and learn.
This morning, on the Silly Mom Thoughts Facebook Fanpage, I wrote:
Love is never having to say “I’m sorry, I crapped on you.” Apparently, my kids love me… a lot.
It turned out to be a huge tease and I received a couple of comments from readers who were anticipating a juicy poo story.
Hm… “juicy” and “poo” shouldn’t go together in a sentence either.
Noted.
The problem is, that my Facebook update wasn’t necessarily meant as a precursor to a hilarious poop story. It was more reminiscing on my part, of past poo trauma.
That’s not to say, of course, that I don’t have a recent poop story. These stories happen almost daily, so I figured you’d all get tired of them.
After reading the responses to my Facebook update, I can see that isn’t so.
Lindsay Maddox… Laughing my way through motherhood.
(And taking submission guidelines literally.)
Remember when MySpace wasn’t ghetto? That’s when my blogging career began. It started innocently: I wanted to lose weight and thought blogging would keep me accountable. I threw in some stories of my firstborn.
People commented.
Most guys are complete wusses when they’re sick.
(HA! I just wrote “pregnant” instead of sick. That was funny. Anyway…)
Most guys, when sick, roll around in agony, whine in misery, certain that they are writhing on death’s doorstep.
Not Clint.
This man has the immune system of an elephant.
(This is, of course, assuming elephants have excellent immune systems. I, for one, have never seen a sick elephant, so I’m going with that analogy.)
And the suck-it-up-ness of something equally tough.
(Sorry, I’m out of animal analogies. My brain is still stuck on sick elephants.) Read more on PhotoBlog: Impromptu…
I have to be completely honest with you: This blog post makes me want to cry. In fact, as I uploaded the pictures for this post and looked back at that face Lily gave me… it choked me up.
Today, despite a horrendously splitting headache, I ventured out of the house with all of my kids in tow. It was more out of necessity than anything.
I had to get two super important prescriptions filled:
I did a very bad thing yesterday; something I try not to do. Something that makes me feel like a very bad mama on the rare occasion that I do it…
Read more on PhotoBlog: Ahhh!…
It has taken me some time, but I am slowly but surely realizing my mom is a genius. Growing up, she worked as a teacher and came home to my brother, dad, and me, only for my dad to have to leave to go work the night shift soon after she arrived.
Read more on My Doctor Is A Quack…
“Mommy, I have a s’prize fow you,” he said with a funny little grin on his face.
I didn’t know whether to be worried or excited to see what he had done. I had heard hardly a peep from him for the past ten minutes.
Read more on “Mommy, I have a s’prize fow you.”…
… this is too dang cute.
My dad got Lily to sing It’s Raining It’s Pouring. If you could squish cheeks through the computer, you’d probably want to while listening to this:
Lily Singing “It’s Raining, It’s Pouring”
This weekend, while sitting with a friend over an early-morning Starbucks fix, I was turned on to an interesting blog idea. My friend and I were talking about blogging and I was explaining things that have worked for me and things that haven’t. One of the things I mentioned that have worked is being real and authentic; that readers don’t want to see happy-go-lucky, my life is so perfect and my kids are amazing, posts.
Yesterday, Heather Melson, author of My Little Expert, posed an interesting question on my The Truth About Playdates blog.
“My kids have never actually had a play date before,” she said. “Any suggestions on how to initiate one, Lindsay?”
I knew it was coming. There’s just no avoiding having “The Talk,” and nowadays, given the media, internet, even parental influence… The Talk seems to be happening earlier and earlier.
For our four-and-a-half year old, it happened today.
It was innocent enough. We were traveling to Great-Grandma’s house and Colby was looking out the window at cars flying by.
That’s when he brought it up.
“Mommy, why do
For our four-and-a-half year old, it happened today.
It was innocent enough. We were traveling to Great-Grandma’s house and Colby was looking out the window at cars flying by.
That’s when he brought it up.
“Mommy, why do Transformers turn into cars?”
And, like any mother would, I turned to Clint and said, “This is all you, Daddy.”
Clint spouted off some impressive Transformer knowledge, going into such detail I was afraid it was too much for Colby’s mind to digest.
“Wow,” I said, when he finished his explanation. “Well, I suppose it’s important to be straightforward about these things.”
“No sense in lying about it,” Clint shrugged.
It’s true, really. He’ll find out soon enough anyway.
Now, with the Transformer Talk under our belts, we’re that much more prepared for that other talk; the one where “when a mommy and daddy love each other very much…”
Maybe then we can put it into Transformer terms too:
“When a Decepticon and Autobot love each other very much…”
Nope. Wait. Decepticons and Autobots are enemies. And robots. And dude robots at that.
Hm.
Suddenly I’m beginning to think having the real “Talk” will be less complicated.
There are only a few rules that must be followed on MomTransit:
1. Mom chooses the music. I don’t do Barney. I don’t do Wee Sing (*shudder*). I can barely stomach Kids Bop, but I will in dire circumstances.
2. No backseat driving. Especially if the last time you played “Red Light, Green Light,” you ran on red and stopped on green. (I’m looking at you, Lily.)
and finally,
3. If we are within 10 minutes of the house, there is no sleeping allowed! I don’t want kids conking out for five minutes and have their little bodies think that’s plenty to sustain them and avoid napping.
Mama needs her naptime for important things.
Like work.
And cleaning.
(And Facebook.)
Today, my friend April and I took our kids to McDonald’s for an (insert sarcasm) incredibly healthy lunch and time to play in the tubes and wear themselves out before naptime.
(You know how desperate a mom is for her kids to nap when she’s willing to brave the disgusting germiness of a McDonald’s Playplace.)
After the kids ran, climbed, and slid their little hearts out, we headed for home. On the way home, Lily began nodding off.
“Uh oh, there she goes,” I said to April.
April, who is a firm believer in the No Car Nap rule had my back.
“Liiii-lllyyyy!” she called to her. “No sleeping, Lily!”
Lily’s head bobbed and she whipped it upright and opened her eyes.
“Good girl!” I smiled into the rearview mirror. “Stay awake, baby girl, we’re almost home!”
Her eyelids were no match for the warm sun beating in through the window and the soft music in the background, though. Again, they slid shut ever so slowly.
“Hey!” April said loudly. “Lily! Lilylilylilylilylily!”
Her eyes half-opened and she gave a funny little smirk.
I turned on Don’t Stop Believin’ from the Glee soundtrack (her favorite song) and rolled the windows down. She fought valiantly against the drowsiness, but her eyelids drooped again.
“Don’t stop believin’!” I turned the music up louder.
My copilot and photographer took some pictures of Lily’s eyelid fight. In the end, she was awake when we pulled into the driveway, so we won the battle of the nap. She was asleep in her bed within five minutes of hitting the pillow.
No sleeping on MomTransit. It’s a rule enforced without mercy.
What I’m listening to:
(This is a new section for my blog. If you’d like to hear what I’m listening to, or songs that I love that pertain to my blog, click the link above. If you purchase the mp3, I get a small portion of the earnings. Don’t feel obligated to, though! I mostly want to share with you the kind of music I love.)
Photos courtesy of April and her sweet Blackberry photo skills.
